Sleep – A Happy Medium, Please?

I’ve started thinking of sleep lately like a dysfunctional boyfriend.   Seriously, sleep and I have had a love/hate thing going on for as long as I can remember, and never seem to find just a happy balance where we can get along normally.

The past few months, sleep has eluded me.  Oh, it’s come around for a day or two, teased me, made me remember how much I adore it, only to go away again, leaving me tossing and turning, missing it desperately for weeks on end.

Sleep is kind of an asshole. I’ve cried many times when sleep has gone away, leaving me exhausted and crazy.

It’s back now with a vengeance.  It’s back to the point where it won’t go away and I can’t get enough.   A couple of days ago, sleep welcomed itself back into my bedroom, lured me in, and I’m hard pressed to turn away from it so I can stay awake long enough to be productive.

Yesterday, I slept in, probably would have slept until noon, but my phone started going off, and I wrenched myself from slumber’s embrace so I could spend some time with my friend, get some housework done.   I returned home with every intention of hitting the ground running, frenzied cleaning and costume making.

I switched out the laundry, then decided I could take a short siesta while the load was drying.  Um no.  Sleep had other ideas, so it kept me under for 3 hours.  Sleep is selfish, and 45 minutes wasn’t enough to satisfy it.  I only escaped because it was either get up or wet the bed.

I fought sleep all evening.  I had to get something accomplished, so I caffeinated, then crashed about midnight.   My alarm was set for 8:30am, since I have quite a bit to do this morning before I head to Kyle, but somehow, my alarm got turned off and I was brought to the surface by my poor dog whining in my face about needing to go out two hours later than planned.

Right now, sleep is still calling to me, insisting that we be together, knowing that I want nothing more than to kick off my shoes, crawl back under the covers and crash indefinitely.   I think sleep needs to back off, because while it sounds lovely, I can’t spend the little time I have unconscious.   Sleep needs to find a balance, and not be so selfish, making it so if I can’t sleep ALL the time, I can’t sleep at all.

That’s just not nice.  Stop being a dick, sleep.  You have way too much power over me, and you know it.